lizcommotion: Lily and Chance squished in a cat pile-up on top of a cat tree (buff tabby, black cat with red collar) (Default)
Hi! I may have subscribed to your journal because you wrote something interesting that showed up while I was browsing dreamwidth or reading my network page. Perhaps you're reading this because you think I wrote something of note. Either way, welcome.

I try to avoid hate speech of any kind on my journal. If I slip up and say something heedless of my own privilege, please tell me - in a non-flaming way. These are teachable moments, not times to whack people over the head with a newspaper.

I could list an alphabet soup of identities, but suffice it to say thatRead more... )
lizcommotion: Chance (black cat) with his arms sticking out of a cat bed, yawning widely (cat chance yawning icon)
Hi spoonie friends,

Does anyone have any experience with online mattress shopping, particularly the Tuft and Needle mattress vs the Leesa mattress?

I have currently slept (quite comfortably) on a Leesa mattress. The Lovely Woman from Baltimore is upgrading to a larger size and wants to make sure my body can handle whatever she orders. Benefits of the Tuft and Needle mattress -- aside from the lower price point -- include the fact that it retains less heat (& I am a living furnace, which can make everyone's lives unpleasant particularly in summer).

I generally do okay with a firmer surface and quite well on the re-stuffed foam pillows on the sofa. I think she's just worried it will be TOO firm. But also if you have any HORROR STORIES or AMAZING TESTIMONIALS those would probably be helpful too.

Thanks for any feedback!
lizcommotion: Lily and Chance squished in a cat pile-up on top of a cat tree (buff tabby, black cat with red collar) (Default)
I haven't played in ages because back pain but...[on one of my six farms] my farmer married Abigail and I decided the nerdy couple would be semi-terrible to their child and so the kid is named Remus. (a compromise between "Latin mythology nerds" and "HP fandom"). I gigglesnort to myself every time I see that kid let me tell you.

Also there is a gender neutral toddler mod for the game if anyone else is interested.
lizcommotion: a hand drawn/colored happy cane (disability cane happy)
I did a thing! A local activist-y thing, even!

I have been calling so many representatives lately that it has become (slightly) less terrifying and so I decided to contact my local board of representatives about a thing that has been bothering me For Awhile. Namely, that it's really unaffordable to use the local rec centers if you're on, say, disability benefits and yet while there is a very wonderful and deserving senior discount there is no discount for "disabled and poor af". (Another thing that bothers me: only one doctor has ever really acknowledged "I would love to get pool exercise, but it's too expensive" as a real thing.)

I got a response as well! Which is excite. The response was (translated from politics-speak) "huh this sounds like an idea that we would like the photo-ops and political capital from, we never thought of that. we're sending it to the correct department to see if it's in the budget and we'll blame them if we can't make it happen. but thanks for the idea!"

So, we'll see?

If you're interested in sending a similar letter to your own reps, here what I sent with space for specifics for your jurisdiction. It's US-focused since it's based on the US benefits system, but could be adapted for other countries. Places for specifics are marked with [[[parentheses]]] so you can find/replace.

text of letter for your editing pleasure )
lizcommotion: Agent carter, in white blouse, looking amused (agent carter amused)
so i finally watched Captain America: Civil War, which I didn't see in theaters because money and also I got upset about a certain winter soldier.

(i am still upset, fyi)

but now that i have finally seen it, I have a fic idea and like...goddammit brain, do you know how many writing projects we're working on? (answer: two novels and i lost count of how many fanfics and also some poetry, that's how many.)

SO I AM SHARING.

minor spoilers for captain america: civil war, also talking about ableism )
lizcommotion: a hand drawn/colored happy cane (disability cane happy)
I thought I was done with the genre of "dystopian shows where a group of young adults compete for survival/resources."

Then I watched The 3% on Netflix, and oh man I want so much more of this show. I have ALL THE FEELS.

First off, some background on the show. Basically, it's about a society where at age 20 people go through "The Process" to decide if they're one of the 3% eligible to live among the elite who have all the resources. This is supposed to make the society fair, because everyone has a chance in this meritocracy, and no one inherits a spot on the Offshore. Mostly what it does is poke at the idea of a perfect meritocracy, and make me think many thoughts about exploitative for-profit colleges. There is also a resistance group (La Causa) working to undermine The Process.

It's a Brazilian show, so unless you speak Portuguese, subtitles are a thing. (This is actually good for me, I process shows better with close captioning or subtitles anyway. YMMV.) There's a racially diverse cast because I think they used Brazilian actors; there's an array of hair types/skin colors. Pretty sure most of the racial subtext is written for a Brazilian audience/understanding of what race means, so I only caught some of it, but it seemed well done to me. A fairly decent blend of genders (though not so much with the queer/trans rep.) ALSO there is a wheelchair user on this show and honestly most of my feels relate to Fernando.

Most shows that feature a disabled character either have them as a side-character, or someone who is inspiration porn, or maybe someone who has a magical disability and thus doesn't have to deal with most of what being disabled is like.

The 3% enters my previous list of "two TV shows and a movie" that speaks to my own experience of disability. Also FWIW I'm not currently a wheelchair user, although they would come in damn handy in museums if it were not a gazillion spoons to actually find one and if they actually had good wheelchairs not crappy for the public ones.

Anyway, the 3% is not perfect, but I'm still catching my breath from that moment of "seeing my feels onscreen".*

Spoilers ahoy (mostly for Fernando's arc).Read more... )
lizcommotion: A hand drawn spinning wheel covered in roses (spinning wheel briar rose)
The Library at Pemberley (8369 words) by lizcommotion
Chapters: 1/1
Fandom: Pride and Prejudice & Related Fandoms, Pride and Prejudice - Jane Austen, Pride and Prejudice (2005), Pride and Prejudice (1995)
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Relationships: Elizabeth Bennet/Female Fitzwilliam Darcy
Characters: Elizabeth Bennet, Kitty Bennet, Georgiana Darcy, Female Fitzwilliam Darcy
Additional Tags: Genderswap, Genderbending, Genderqueer, Femslash, Alternate Universe - Gender Changes, Light Bondage, Cunnilingus, Vaginal Fingering, Dildos, Regency, Enthusiastic Consent
Summary:

"Elizabeth's heart stopped for a moment when Fitz said "rare folios," and she swore once they resolved this that she would explain to her wife, slowly, that she should have mentioned these folios when first she proposed."

Elizabeth and her wife Fitz Darcy return to Pemberley after their honeymoon. Her fear that the marriage to Fitz was a mistake seem to be confirmed when the two argue about sharing Pemberley's vast library. Will they be able to find a suitable compromise? A tender romance with a side of erotica.

lizcommotion: sign which says "Please do not feed the fears" (brain weasels (do not feed))
So dreamwidth is important and good for my mental wellness, but my reading page had gotten to that point of "too overwhelming to actually check it regularly." I did a pretty brutal reading page purge, which I need at least for a bit until it's a more regular part of my routine again. No hard feelings intended, just, brains why are they the way they are I don't even know?

=^-^=

Linkspam

Nov. 30th, 2016 02:39 pm
lizcommotion: hands offering chocolate surrounded by golden light - offered to you! (chocolate for you)
Short Fiction

A Dead Djinn in Cairo is AMAZING and I want to read all the things in this alternate universe. Supernatural mystery set in Cairo that wasn't colonized because of the introduction of magic. Fatma is the daughter of a clockmaker, a detective, and wears suits. Some queer content. Beautifully written.

A Cup of Salt Tears creepy kappa short story that is also very good. cn for kappa's being dubious about consent, and some horror elements

Political, some content notes apply
Read more... )

Political, but hopeful/helpful
Read more... )
Political Shirts for Sale from small creators
Read more... )

Writing

on 12/4 at 7 pm EST there will be a Twitter chat for disabled writers on "resistance through writing". (note, use of word "crip" as reclamation). more info here

Fun

this is a hilarious twitter live tweet reading of a terrible book.

adorable + funny short puppy video

Stitch Maps are a new kind of knitting chart that show the shape of the fabric you are supposed to be making. Much easier for (at least) my brain. Maybe yours too?

[personal profile] maramcreates introduced me to Lily Allen and I've been enjoying her entire discography. In particular I think Never Gonna Happen should be the anthem for the Awkward Army. Fuck You is a good 2016 anthem. (Both youtube links have lyrics and are somewhat explicit, fyi.)
lizcommotion: Agent Carter, in white blouse, looking determined (agent carter determined)
If you are looking for light in the darkness, may I recommend "Legends of Tomorrow" (if you have not already seen it)?

Pros:

  • Canonically bi character!

  • Ladies kissing!

  • POC include a 4,000 demigoddess and a 20-something automechanic/superhero.

  • ALSO with legitimately diverse ages, not just "I've been reincarnated forever".

  • Character growth/change for pretty much everyone, lots of "what are ethics here?" that don't automatically default to "well killing is the easiest way to prevent killing, let's do that"

  • Appreciated moments of "hey white dude, the 50s were not a nostalgic time for people not privileged like you."

  • The actor who plays Rory in Dr Who plays a "Time Master" and there is a character called Rory and actor-Rory says (paraphrased) "Why is Rory always such an idiot?"

  • Did I mention that it's about using time travel to stop an immortal evil dude from committing genocide?

  • I appreciate that it rejects the whole "but if we stop the genocide, worse things will happen!" approach that has been in too much of SFF

  • There is going to be a crossover soon and it will involve canonically bi character and Supergirl's cast and THE SHIPS OMG


Cons:

  • Possibly too real right now for some people

  • Some of the character backstories make more sense if you watch The Arrow/The Flash, but I'm pretty sure you could also look things up on the Arrowverse Wiki
lizcommotion: Agent Carter, in white blouse, looking determined (agent carter determined)
Yes, You Should Absolutely Wear a Safety Pin
explains origin of the safety pin symbol, context for the current controversy, and also self-defense videos (aimed at women who wear hijab, but suitable for anyone). author is a Muslim filmmaker

November 15th (i.e. tomorrow) is a global day of action protesting the Dakota Access Pipeline. Please help spread the word even if you are (like me) unsure of your spoon-related-ability to attend.
lizcommotion: A hand drawn spinning wheel covered in roses (spinning wheel briar rose)
i have recently discovered/realized that most of my executive function runs on anxiety. or i should say, RAN on anxiety. this is...not sustainable. omg, is it not. but let me backtrack.
cn: descriptions of anxiety as relates to coping with executive function )

+1 anxiety level-up, now there's a new boss to fight i guess

SO, here's some thinkythoughts and reflection, in case that helps anyone else.

but also, how does anyone get anything the fuck done? suggestions welcome, with the understanding that brains are different.
lizcommotion: A hand drawn spinning wheel covered in roses (spinning wheel briar rose)
From Liisa Hantsoo and C. Neill Epperson. Premenstrual Dysphoric Disorder: Epidemiology and Treatment. Curr Psychiatry Rep. 2015 Nov; 17(11): 87.

Progesterone levels are low during menses and the follicular phase and are mirrored by progesterone's main metabolite, allopregnanolone (ALLO), also a neuroactive steroid. Progesterone and ALLO increase in the luteal phase and decrease quickly around menses. This chronic exposure followed by rapid withdrawal from ovarian hormones may be a key factor in the etiology of PMDD [12]. In a recently developed animal model of PMDD based on progesterone withdrawal, rats in withdrawal from physiological doses of progesterone exhibited social withdrawal and anhedonia, symptoms characteristic of PMDD [13]. Indeed, preclinical research demonstrates that chronic progesterone exposure followed by rapid withdrawal is associated with increased anxiety behavior and alterations in γ-aminobutyric acid (GABA)A receptor function [12–14]. Recent work suggests that this effect may not be due to progesterone itself, but progesterone's main metabolite ALLO, as blocking progesterone conversion to ALLO blocks the aforementioned effects of progesterone [15].

ALLO is a potent positive allosteric modulator of the GABAA receptor, similar to alcohol or benzodiazepines, with anxiolytic, anesthetic, and sedative properties [16••]. It is possible that women with PMDD have developed tolerance to the arousal-reducing and GABA-enhancing effects of ALLO.

...

What is that you say about GABA?

From Pain: Hope through Research

GABA (or gamma-aminobutyric acid) is predominately an inhibitory neurotransmitter in that it generally decreases or blocks the activity of neurons. Most of what we know of its role in pain is related to its function in inhibiting spinal cord neurons from transmitting pain signals and therefore dampening pain. Chemicals that are similar to GABA have been explored as possible analgesics, but because GABA is so widespread in the nervous system it is difficult to make a GABA-like drug without affecting other nervous system functions. As we learn more about the specific roles of GABA receptors, drug development may be accelerated.

INTERESTING.

If I had all the monies I would fund a study about the link between GABA, chronic pain, and PMDD like...10 years ago. BUT ANYWAY I leave these thoughts for you my darlings, in the hopes that it may help someone.

Meanwhile a bit of my brain is still going "so, PMDD is possibly my brain suffering monthly withdrawal from its own chemicals. GREAT."
lizcommotion: A hand drawn terrier "smiling" and looking slightly cross-eyed, shown from the neck up (dog terrier djinni)
So now Stardew Valley has been Officially Released for Mac and Linux I thought I would post about mods I am using. I don't know how well the mods work on Mac and Linux -- though I plan to test the Linux ones, natch -- but this is just here for general reference. Also, for an overview of mods on an Official Review Site, here's one on PC Gamer.

I basically categorize the types of mods I use into two: gameplay mods and cosmetic mods. There are also two install methods. In one, you backup your Stardew Valley folder (backup: important), and then replace a particular file with a mod file. So you can replace the file for cows with a new file and viola, different cows! In another, you use a mod manager called SMAPI. You place the mods inside the SMAPI folder, then launch the game from SMAPI. (This is used for more complex mods, like "make fishing easier" and "let me summon my goddamn horse").

Note: it's good to install mods from a reputable source, and I use either nexusmods or stardewmods.

So, ONWARD.

Gameplay Mods to save time, mental energy, and head desking

    Time Speed Adjust the day length so if you don't want to feel rushed, you don't have to ([personal profile] tyger this mod is for you!)
  • NPC Map Locations For when you have to give an NPC a quest item/present and don't feel like finding out where they are/might be on the wiki every 5 minutes.

  • Chest Labels because my memory is not that great and this way I can actually sort things and not go "where the fuck is that thing I need" all the time

  • Signs for your fruit trees so you can remember what you planted, where

  • Tapper's dream mod (technically a cheat) makes the non-fruit trees grow in winter and other things that just make them easier to grow. Note: because it makes it easier to harvest the seeds so they grow on purpose rather than everywheres, can affect lumber production if you don't stay on top of purposeful planting

  • Horse Whistle which teleports your horse to your location. Which just...trust me, if you don't have a horse yet. IT'S BETTER.

  • Slower fence decay because I have better things to do than repair fences all the goddamn time

  • Show sell price so you can scroll over your inventory and see item sell price


    • There's also an easier fishing mod that might be useful (linked from PC Gamer article) but it's not from one of the modding sites I usually use.

      Cosmetic mod post coming later when I'm not trying to adulting.
lizcommotion: a line of ducklings walking towards the viewer (duckling line)
The Stardew Valley Mac/Linux Beta is now available! I don't know if everyone is in Pokemon-land but if you haven't been able to play LET ME REC IT for you.

Steam beta pwd is MonoGame2016

Beta bug report page

dev tweet with instructions & responses. @concernedape is really good about responding to help requests in a timely manner, too

Planning on downloading the Linux beta myself later because then I don't have to keep booting onto my Windows partition.

I still need to make a Mods post but I expect those will also work slightly differently on Mac/Linux.

in case you are interested, games I am currently playing:

  • Stardew Valley

  • Ingress

  • Pokemon Go

  • Star Trek Timelines (on a trial download, still deciding what I think)

  • Animal Crossing New Leaf (though I am way behind but I time travel shamelessly so nbd)

  • Dragon Age: Inquisition (but I'm stalled because my hands do not always like PS4 controller)
lizcommotion: Pile of books (book)
I had complete sensory overload last night so I found a few random books available on Overdrive and checked one out. The first I was going to try had all these "what a great Christian fairytale!" things in the beginning and I went...OK NOPE not my jam. So I read Soundless, which I was hesitant about because it had the capacity to be so very bad if the author didn't do her research.

(She did her research, as far as I can tell. But if you disagree, please lmk.)

Soundless
is about a small mining town high in an Asian-inspired-fantasy-setting. The town is completely cut off from outsiders, and their only communication is a zip line: they send minerals down, they get food back. (Their soil is too poor to grow any food.) Other than miners, those who work the supply line, and servants, the other main job is as an artist/calligrapher. Everyone in the town is Deaf, and has been for centuries, so they have artists observe the day's events, record them meticulously on scrolls every evening, and put them in the town square every morning so everyone knows the day's news. Then the scrolls are kept for future generations.

Everyone has forgotten what sound is, and everything is completely designed to be accessible to those who are Deaf, and there's no stigma about it. However, some people are beginning to lose their vision, which means they can't work in the mines. As there are less minerals to trade, this is creating a food shortage for the entire community.

The main character mysteriously regains her hearing. There is a good bit of time dedicated to her having complete sensory overload, and wondering why their ancestors ever wanted hearing in the first place. However, she might be able to save her people, because it's always been too dangerous to climb down the mountain when you can't hear avalanches.

The author avoids tropes like "hearing is better" and "people regaining their hearing is the only happy ending." Also, vision loss is only tragic because there's resource scarcity (and prejudice against those who can't work). There's some pretty great stuff when the MC interacts with hearing people along the lines of "UGH why don't they understand these BABY SIGNS they are so obvious" and also when meeting other people who have lost their hearing some "look your sign language is not exactly the same as mine let's figure out what this sign is." Also, "learning the words for sounds."

It also doesn't romanticize the mountain town as being full perfect magical disabled people: there's injustice and mean people, too.

A fun book to get me through sensory overload that did not make me shouty and was a good example of "hey look at the social model of disability in action" for YA lit. Also, yay for "not another generic European fantasy setting." Planning to get it for my nephew once he can deal with a het romance plotline.
lizcommotion: Agent Carter, in white blouse, looking determined (agent carter determined)
There's a post on tumblr about Lady Rage that is worth a read. (cn: gifs, cis-centric in that it doesn't explicitly deal with trans issues but touches briefly on "other marginalized groups" specifically women of color, but I think the form of socially accepted anger they speak to is relevant to many and I did not note open transphobia just more...writing from an AFAB perspective? ANYWAY IDK DECIDE FOR YOURSELVES IF THIS IS FOR YOU).

DM: How often my friends and I seem to ask each other permission before we actually admit that we’re experiencing anger. “I know ___ was just trying to help, but isn’t this email weird?” or “I’m sure I’m blowing this out of proportion….”, etc. etc. I sometimes feel like IT TAKES A VILLAGE [of HARPIES and SHREWS and VALKYRIES and VIRAGOS - every last one of them terribly, terribly shrill] for a woman to admit that she is feeling mad!

DS: Yeah, there’s our feminine socialization in action right there. “Is this emotion that I’m having actually the emotion that I’m having? Am I authorized to have this emotion? I’ll need that emotional authorization form filled out in triplicate before I can actually experience it without feeling bad.” This is a huge benefit to back-channel communications with fellow ladyfriends. It’s almost worthwhile to get mad, if only because of the loud communal cackling I get to do by processing that anger with my pals. And I do think there’s something valuable about the way women respond in undercover, subtle & funny ways to the ridiculousness we witness daily. For one thing, so much great art has arisen from feminine rage. For another, I don’t want to go around actually Hulking out all the time, but I do want to acknowledge my negative feelings more honestly in public. I think. I have a lot of conflicting thoughts about this.
the h/t #NormalizeLadyRage on Twitter also has some good content and hopefully someone will storify that shit.

also touches on fandom, dismissal of female fans, and HULKING OUT.
lizcommotion: A black-and-white photo of a Victorian woman (victorian lady)
I ran out of new episodes of Orphan Black (which I enjoy but does make me so twitchy about eugenics and creeped out), so of course I watched seven episodes of PBS's Mercy Street last night. It's a period show set during the Civil War at a Union hospital in Alexandria, VA (though filmed in Richmond). I have mixed feelings. Spoilers within.

tw: on-screen period racist violence, sexual assault and why this makes me shouty, also the copious white tears of Confederates including PTSD and SI, all the mental health triggers )

tl;dr However historically accurate or not Mercy Street may be, I did not like it and it made me shouty. It did keep me occupied during a pain flare but uh. Would not rec.
(this is a show where my partner looks at me and goes, "Why did you watch this?" and I go, "Um, pretty skirts? Filmed locally? Shouty historian? I...don't know.")
lizcommotion: typewriter on a table, faded (writing)
Midsomer Murders x Dr Who

Why does no one move from Midsomer? Why are only two bumbling yet affable detectives in charge of a string of seemingly unrelated murders instead of a giant task force full of forensics people? Why is it still seen as a pleasant destination?

The Doctor knows some deeper work must be at play. His only regret is that it has taken him so long to investigate...better get ready to RUN.

Profile

lizcommotion: Lily and Chance squished in a cat pile-up on top of a cat tree (buff tabby, black cat with red collar) (Default)
lizcommotion

March 2017

S M T W T F S
   12 34
567891011
12131415161718
19202122232425
262728293031 

Syndicate

RSS Atom

Most Popular Tags

Style Credit

Expand Cut Tags

No cut tags
Page generated May. 26th, 2017 01:48 am
Powered by Dreamwidth Studios